Pillow thoughts

Lying in bed, so tired. Eyes shut so that I resemble an Asian person more than usual. Thinking thinking thinkiiiing of something quick and fun to write but alas.. I cant. Did get an au-pairing job which is very cool, the kids are too cute. Makes me broody ;) The next boy I lunge better watch out..urrm that is IF I was actually having any luck in that area. I feel like the boss of coming right has banished me back to the desert. With one long finger pointing in my direction, all he says is "go" and I know where he is sending me, all the way back to Kalahari.With heavy feet and a hanging head I make my way. . .

Day: 50 (over exaggeration) I am in the desert and this drought is really getting to me. It's so hot here and I have no supplies. Obviously no water or food..it looks like I might die here. Luckily for me I have had enough practice this year with such dry circumstances that the harsher effects of these conditions have not fully taken their toll. Hopefully tomorrow things will be looking up.

Peace from the dry lands.

Festival Love

Sorry for lack of posting, just been away for weekend.. Rocking the Daisies and it was nothing short of amazing.. been in bed since 9. Am absolutely finished. Stories and laughs tomorrow.

Desperate times call for desperate measures

This mornings alarm was set for 8:00 am. Have serious intention to be at gym in half an hour come home and get a move on with life. Instead.. I hit snooze. (just 15 minutes, its chilled!?) 8:15... my finger is magnetically drawn to snooze again, this time ill just close my eyes for 30 min more. Wake up 30 min later feeling like a queen, that felt like the longest 30 min ever.. stoked I hit that snooze. Check clock... the time should be 8:45 ish.. REAL time 11.40. Fuuuuuck! (excuse my language but that was literally the only train of thought I had going at that very moment.) Cool. losers for the rest of the day!

Drag my sorry self out of bed (now mid afternoon) starving as my stomach has been denied 2 meals. Dreaming up the most delish meal I could possibly think of at this time of food crisis. Open the fridge door & I kid you not the contents are : 1 paw paw ( would have been suitable for breakfast), 15 bottles of water, a cucumber,plain yoghurt and an avo. "Okay, thats fine i'll just make do with whats in the pantry". Contents of the pantry: rice pasta (which I urge everyone to avoid),sugar,some funny tomato paste aaand a potato.. WTF!? Now I feel like an Ethiopian child starving in the desert, suddenly I see what I think is a mirage at first, but upon closer inspection I realise it is real. Heart skips a beat. A full pack of Marlboro Lights. This will be my meal substitute, I will smoke and smoke and smoke until I am full and food is no longer an issue.

This was a mistake. After cigarette no. 2 due to lack of food and a brain full of smoke im feeling more nauseas then full, not to mention the fact that i'm probably developing emphysema as we speak. Oh the luxurious life of a student and the stupid things we do to survive our peasant lifestyles ;)

Reasons to L.O.V.E Cape Town

The Vibe
The People
The Weather
Camps Bay
The Beaches
The Mountains
Cape Town i.love.you : )

Does my bum make these jeans look too tight..?

Quick personal opinion: Soccer players have the best bodies around... watching the male swimmers at CG and got to talking what sports gives you the best bod.. and hands down it goes to the boys on the field.

Enough said :).

As a girl you depend on the opinion of others when it comes to what you're wearing and how you look. This weekend however I came to the conclusion that some girls have those friends who will say they look OK or let them leave the house looking like a like a R5,00 about to go work her afternoon shift. On Saturday the theme to the 21st was Jet skirts for girls and yes the main aim was to get us in the shortest of outfits for the boys delight... unfortunately for them i'm pretty sure that the majority of girls sporting the shortest shorties where those with the most junk in their trunk.. shame. One girl in particular who I don't know therefore don't feel too bad about judging, wore a skirt so tight it might as well have been painted on. To add to this sight she opted for full panties (which is a major no no in anything tight) that clung so tightly to her bum it looked as though she had 4 ass cheeks instead of two.

I see how what i'm saying here is harsh but why didn't one of her friends tell her the honest truth, would you not rather be a little embarrassed by the opinion of someone close to you and still be able to go and change rather than having the whole party cringing every time you bent over..? Next time be a good mate and tell your friend the truth even if it makes you feel bad.. you don't want to be linking arms with "that girl", besides a hot mate gives people the impression that your better looking than you are as the lookers seem to stick together.

walking while everyone else runs

Ooookay I just had a look/ rather stalkerishly long look at some other blogs( mainly those up for awards for SA blog awards) and realised that i'm lagging a bit on my updates and content. I know i know, I dont want my blog to be like everyone else's but would love to know if your liking what you are reading. I will also make and effort to be more regular and obviously keep the content awesome.. tell your friends to read and follow.. "because if it cools your china down, and cools their china's down and their china's china down.. soon everyone will be refreshed."

Food for thought

Unless your 6 weeks preggers no one wants to be spooning a partner who's tummy could be housing a small baby.. should I use the old cliche and point out that : Spring had sprung folk and that its time we all be going to gym like moths to a bright light.. I however ( and I hope i'm not alone here ) find myself eating decadent cakes and food I probably dont even enjoy but because we only have a crucial 2months and 21 days to get our bodies beach ready my body seems to be in survival mode and therefore feels the need to take in and stack whatever it sees coming.. I suppose you could say I am on a see food diet!? ha

Jokes aside, I hope that I find the self discipline to ditch the donut's and go from caterpillar to

butterfly. wish me luck

Its all in the name of the game

It seems that once you're in your 20's you get thrust into the deep end of the dating pool. It is from here onwards that one spends their life fishing through the water until they finally find their preferred catch. Many of you will agree with me that actually finding someone to date goes nothing like it does in the movies, there is no lift door about to close that you're racing towards only to be stopped by the hand of a handsome man. Once you're in the lift you notice that the music seeping through his ipod earphones is in fact you FAVOURITE song (what are the chances). Luckily you are the only two in the lift and therefore are able to strike up an un-awkward conversation... "Justin Bieber.. loooove him", and just like that with an eye locking moment you find yourself two weeks down the line dating Mr. Wonderful.

NO! it does not work like this, who is going to say yes to a date with a random that you met in a lift that's listening to JBiebs anyway? Luckily for me, both of my digs mates have recently entered into the dating game. One met Mr. Bravado while doing a promotion in the holidays and after he pursued her for more than two months she finally agreed to go out on a date with him, although its only been a couple of dates she seems to have found someone whose company she enjoys as well as shares a lot in common with. The other met Mr. Villiera on campus one day.. both realizing there ambitions of being successful and on top of the world they too decided to join forces. Now not only is this a major blow to my ego as the only attention I seem to be getting from guys is my trainers hand positioned under my ass to get me to lunge lower! This then made me wonder : does it depend on the time and place you're in that makes you more susceptible to dating? It definitely has nothing to do with looks and personality as I am a 10 in both areas.

All I know is that if this is the case UCT and Sea Point are my new hangouts as Fez and High Cape are clearly not working in my favour.. neither is Wembley square gym I guess. Ooooh well there are plenty of fish in the sea and I better just be patient with my hook,line and sinker.

Check this out!!

If your looking for anything going on in Cape Town,whats hot and the vibe thats happening go to http://www.2oceansvibe.com/ Awesome blog that will something for everyone to read :)

Its a Boy Girl thing

By now our tans have faded, highlights have darkened and we're all tired of having sand in our shoes. Summer is gone and so begins a new season in Cape Town.New stories to make,new loves to have and new wardrobes to get. One thing about winter that may put a dampener on things is that the nights seem to be lonelier and my bed now has space for two...except there's only one occupant! Being in Cape Town I thought I'd have my fair share of options to choose from, after all this is home to some of the best looking guys around. What did not cross my mind however is that in actual fact that guy at the table next to me that I'm trying to make eye contact with, is actually checking out my brother and his mate.. hmmm major ego booster!

The type of men in CT can be classified into a few cliques. The places they flock to after dark provide them with the company they keep and therefore the groups to which they fit. The Jol Whores: These boys follow the newest upcoming clubs and places to be seen at and obviously can be spotted at their regular table at Caprice on a Sunday drinking red bull and vodka (Grey Goose only please). The Long Streeters: Long street is home to a massive variety of people, however those who seem to dominate are out scouting for retro or emo jols where they can rock to dub step and trance till 6 in the morning. Here the type of guy gets very interesting and your spade lines may get lost under debates of who's skinnies are skinnier or who's dreads are longer. Tigers Prisoners: These boys will rarely be seen anywhere else as they have a commitment to Tiger on a Tuesday,Thursday,Friday and Saturday. They will most likely be sporting the typical blue collared shirt with the collar popped (a must), heavily gelled hair (with frosted tips) blue jeans and square toe shoes.. and yes sometimes these are white. If I can offer some advice, Tiger should only be visited when ones numbers are low as this is known to be an easy hunting ground.

Yes this may sound like a girls free ticket to finding a bed warmer but I'll warn you that each of these places needs to be sifted through if you're looking for a keeper. Although girls travel in small packs they are not however tied down to one male clique, we prefer to change it up a little rather than risking a lame night out. Clique Bouncing (we'll call it) comes hand in hand with the perfect look.. hello first impressions are everything! Unfortunately for us females as a group, there are always those that will let us down. Recently at a friends toga party I found myself cringing for some of the girls. In my mind a toga is a bed sheet that gets wrapped around ones body in a Grecian style, some lovely ladies however thought they were meant to use their pillow cases rather than sheets. Let me just say that it looked as though someone had cling wrapped a bag of hail .

Lucky for us all - boys and girls. There is soon to be a major influx of hot (hopefully) tourists heading to our land and I wish you all the best of luck in finding your big spoon.

Seventh time lucky

The day arrives.. april the 9th 2010. attempt SEVEN! In my mind this is it.. no going back, this will be the final time I attempt my drivers as I can no longer take the rejection, its worse than a typical night out at tiger for a ginger. After a 2hour driving lesson I arrive at the yard, more nervous than i've been before.. i think! My hands are sweaty, knees week, arms are heavy feel like my breakfast might come up soon.. im like Eminem before his big rap battle. My instructor told me to wear something short and now im regretting my decision not to. When I see the tester walking towards me I try play the situation up a little so that he feels sorry for me.. bending over and breathing slowly I tell him how nervous I am and im not feeling to well, his response " do you have your learners on you!?" Awesome.. its going great already.. one can only imagine the sweat flowing from every place possible making the situation more uncomfortable that necessary, but when he doesnt ask me to do my inside checks it makes me think that maybe today wont be too bad..!?? "So I understand this is not your first attempt?" aaaah the question I hate most.. so embarrassing to answer, if it was a measly 3 times I would be bragging but to have to admit to "um.. not its my 7th" cheeks blazing is not fun.

The 20min yard part flies by and when Im over the hill start and realise that im out the yard I burst into tears.. I can see the look on his face thinking "oh God not a crier.. Please no" ( men cant handle it when girls cry..ha) "wwwhy are you crying.. just relax" through sobs "im sorry its just i 've.. never been through the yard before" these were happy tears by the way but I can see him thinking I am mad.. and how he wished he didnt have to take this delinquent driver for her test today. By now he is probably as nervous as I am and out of the corner of my I, I catch his foot floating close to the brakes and clutch.. just in case it comes to that. Okay so far so good.. im relaxing more and more and am feeling pretty smug in the drivers seat.. this does not last long however as we approach the mount Vesuvius of hills. In first at the bottom..approaching 30 revs..must change to 2nd? chug chuug chuuuuug up this hill, barely moving..need to change down to 1st..while I am fine with my use of acceleration i forget to push the clutch full in and probably burn about half of the tyre tread off. Almost suffering from an asthma attack from the rubber smoke my tester has to use his clutch and change down for me. Done, fail, good job Jess, you will now be that girl who is just not able to pass her drivers..fuck!

But have no fear its obviously my lucky day, he turns to me and says just carry on.. dont stress.. woooohooooo nothing can stop me now. This guy is putty in my hands and im going to pass. This gives me a small leap of confidence enough to get the the end of the route.. and now its hell all over again while you have to wait for them to add up your points. I always wonder how they used to calculate points in the old days as all my previous instructors have whipped out some fancy Nokia or Samsung ( this is where all the money you pay goes to) to help them with the points. The waiting is not cool, it takes forever and I cant see what he's writing or ticking/crossing making it worse.. it feels like I've been waiting for over an hour when he looks over at me and sighs.. Oh shit. Okay Jessica you must realize that you did make some mistakes that are not acceptable but I can see you are nervous and can drive (I. CAN. DRIVE. HELLO) so.... pass box: tick :). To explain my excitement and other feelings is hard to put in writing.. Obviously I cry again and hug him ( I feel like I should be doing much more -which would obviously not be appropriate) but seeing how he reacted to the hug, i opt for a hand shake instead.

Ha haa I am now officially a driver.. watch out for me on the roads Cape Town.

To lunge... or not to lunge!?

Sorry about the delay on a new post but material has been lacking :)

I'm proud to announce that I am no longer sisters with the Kalahari desert as I recently experienced a rain fall that ended my drought.. thanks to tiger ( land of the lunges). When I was thinking about lunging and how its always a hot topic of conversation.. who lunged who, will I lunge tonight etc etc. it dawned on me that so many girls as well as myself will never opt for making the first move, and when you ask the guys they're always saying how they wish girls would make the first move......

I'm pretty sure that most girls ( and boys) would agree with me when it comes to the daunting task of coming right, no one wants to psych themselves up to the point of no return and then get hit with a rejection so hard that the music stops playing and the spotlight is soley focused on you.This may in fact be a major reason for the lack of initiation from the girls side.

There are many types of rejection that one may experience (not that I know from personal experience but that I've heard of). 1. The flat hand bat: This consists of the lunger making a move, eyes closed and lips pouting only to be greeted by a flat palm from the batter to the lips of the lunger.. in a case like this one hopes that no one else is around and that there is a quick escape route.. also that it is dark so the redness of embarrassment cant be seen, if it is noticed one can always claim bar rash. 2.The Cheek: Ooooh the cheek, this could easily be the worst type of bat to receive. Similar to the flat hand the lunger is greeted with a cheek, however in most cases the cheek can be mistaken for the mouth (especially after a few drinks) and so the lunger thinks he's been accepted and therefore continues to lunge which then means tongue and spit and an even bigger loser complex when they realise that it is in fact only... the CHEEK!!! 3. The pigeon neck: This rejection always seems to be made when others are around or in close view as well as the likely hood that more than one or two of your mates were present for this bat ( much to their enjoyment). Now in this case the lunger will literally lunge, in some cases from more than 1metre away (hence the name lunge) and just go for it, not expecting it the batter in shock will draw back their neck and face in the fastest movement possible to avoid any contact with the lips.. facial expressions on an occasion like this are priceless. I am lucky enough to have a friend who is prone to experiencing bat on many occasions, and I can say that it is often the highlight of my night to see him trying.. As harsh as this may sound, if you have a friend who is down on their luck with the lunge.. stick around, i can guarantee some serious entertainment for your evening!

Beating the bulge (well trying)

Like most girls my age, weight is always an issue or a permanent voice in the back of ones head. Since std 9 i've been trying my hardest to do what I can to tone and tighten..but its harder then you think. It's almost as though once a diet starts the only adverts on tv are about chocolates or ice-cream, and all you want to do is eat..eat EAT! Since first year spread (probably the most depressing thing that comes with starting varsity), and you try and reassure yourself thats its not soo bad until you see your parents for the first time and the expression on their faces says it all. Also sublte hints such as why dont you have the salad, you love salads or lets just order water for the table.. since when did i love salads and water for a meal... never! First year spread.. check! constant need to loose the booze bulge.. check.. motivation for gym/running... still working on it. Now that im in Cape Town, I wanted to make a change & due to my major lack of motivation I invested in a personal trainer.

Every December we go to Knysna, and there are about 5/6 families that have been going for over 10 years.. each year we arrive everyone looks the same despite a hair colour change or something subtle..however this year one of our members arrived looking buff and cut like he had just entered into a Mr. Abs competition.. this aswell as and ego bigger then his pecs will ever become. The admiration that he got from eveyone made me realise that this is my goal.. I want to come back in December and have everyone commenting on me and drooling over me, all those who used to view me as just one of the groups will be elbowing eachother out the way to get a lunge in.. but i'll be batting them away with extreme enjoyment.

To top off my insecurities of appearances, I am lucky enough to live with to beauties who can basically eat whatever and whenever they want and still come out looking ontop.. its great! So, now I have signed up with a trainer.. feeling a bit nervous I go for my first meeting with him. Of course he is this massive guy with biceps bulging so much that he probably cant bend his arm enough to hold his cellphone on his ear, let alone get into the right position to wipe his bum. He's a Shwartzenegger look a like.. minus about 3m in height, but he's awesome. 'What are your goals' he asks... 'Um to wow everyone who sees me in December, if people are worrying that I might have an eating disorder wont bother me either'. you know what they say nothing tastes as good as thin feels (still questioning that). Anyway we have established the goals and aims for my training programme and tomorrow the shit hits the fan. Not only am I seriously unfit, I am a smoker which adds to the struggle in being able to work out for longer than 30 min.

I have to admit that my first three sessions were not too bad and I was feeling pretty happy with myself, and im sure I can see a difference in my thighs.. maybe its just a mirage from the dehidration i've suffered. After the first week im feeling positive about training and week two comes along-Monday: 20 min warm up& I almost fainted.. then into the PIT. This is already daunting on its own with all those roided up beefcakes benchpressing so much they're about to pop an intestine or something. As if this is not bad enough I am doing squats and lunges and 1 min runs every 30sec and im DYING physically. I have to ask for a break as i'm seeing black dots in my eyes and the colour has drained from my face completely, breaks over and its no mercy for me. I am sweating so much that it looks like i've been training in the swimming pool... definately not going to find a boyfriend in the gym, and if I do well love is blind then. An hour goes by and training is finished.. thank god! Now this is what I call a work out session, my legs are so shakey that im walking down the stairs as though I have polio, legs so wide apart im practically sitting on the steps and a full dependancy on the banister.. it must be a hilarious sight. To be honest the feeling doesnt get better it only gets worse and today I feel as though someone has beaten my thighs with a wooden spoon and a hose pipe they're burning so badly... for all this pain, the results better be worth it.

Always the passenger, never the driver.

My day started off with very high hopes, I had things to do and accomplish and was very confident that things were going to go according to plan...however : For breakfast the only thing that I felt would satisfy me was a bowl of delicious Special K with ice cold milk. No Special K..shit! Ok second option,my moms musli (it would just have to do). My first mouthful of the musli had an odd musk flavour to it which didnt taste normal, as I took a closer look into the cereal I was greeted by a very cosy family of maggots, who seemed highly irritated that my pouring had distured their home of webs and cacoons (or whatever maggots live in).After having a small gag on the side plate, i decided that i would have to settle for coffee and a cigarette.

Next my nerves started to kick in as it dawned on me that in 2hrs I would be doing my drivers.... FOR THE 6TH TIME, on the same day as my 18 yr old sister. Never at the age of 21 did I think that I would still be trying to organise myself lifts to get around because I didn't have my drivers-C.r.i.n.g.e!!! By now my nerves are almost out of control and I remember my mom gave me a semi tranquilizer to take.. although she stressed I only take one, I took 4 just to be safe. Apparently chocolate also helps calm nerves, so this topped off with some rescue and im buzzing.However I'm still considering a shot of whiskey..? but decide against it.

12:30 pm comes and my instructer is at the gate, as I am about to get into the car i notice he has put these 'funky' (according to him) black and grey canvas like seat covers on. Unfortunately for him the grey area is right where one would sit and I can now clearly see which holes he sweats from and how much he sweats too..gross! Obviously after performing like a champ in the yard with just me and sweat bottoms it's time to hit the testing station. By now my sweat is adding to his and I can feel the sweat soaking into the chair.. this is not helping my situation at all. As I walk into the license department I am reminded why it is one of my top 5 places to be (please note the sarcasm),as one is always greeted by an extremely smiley and polite face behind the counter and the smell of well washed bodies-not. The lady who comes to collect my forms and photos is chewing her gum with her mouth so widely opened that I can easily see what she has had for lunch as well as the fillings in her back molars.She however is not nearly as bad a Talita.. the tester. Talita is explaining the procedure to me so quickly that I can't catch on and am too scared to ask her to repeat herself (thank god i've done this so many times I know the drill better than my own name), not to mention that her top is pulled so far down i'm practically motor boating her cleavage from across the table. Finally she tells me to go wait at the car for pre-trip inspection. Waiting for Talita..waiting..waiting,sweating in the over 30 degrees heat..still waiting..my hair has now started to resemble an oily black frying pan im sweating so much and FINALLY I see her casually strolling towards me under the biggest straw hat ever.. would she share with me-maybe? i'll try some sucking up later. To add to my luck, there is no time for sucking up to Talita, my test begins at 2:00 pm and by 2:05 I am on the phone to my mom in tears, "I have failed again".Clearly Talita didnt feel the need to go soft on me, thanks..... for nothing!

In case you were wondering, my sister did pass, on her first time 2hrs before me. Nothing more degrading than having to ask your younger sister to drive you around for the whole of December. You know what they say, "always a passenger, never a driver"