Food for thought

Unless your 6 weeks preggers no one wants to be spooning a partner who's tummy could be housing a small baby.. should I use the old cliche and point out that : Spring had sprung folk and that its time we all be going to gym like moths to a bright light.. I however ( and I hope i'm not alone here ) find myself eating decadent cakes and food I probably dont even enjoy but because we only have a crucial 2months and 21 days to get our bodies beach ready my body seems to be in survival mode and therefore feels the need to take in and stack whatever it sees coming.. I suppose you could say I am on a see food diet!? ha

Jokes aside, I hope that I find the self discipline to ditch the donut's and go from caterpillar to

butterfly. wish me luck

Its all in the name of the game

It seems that once you're in your 20's you get thrust into the deep end of the dating pool. It is from here onwards that one spends their life fishing through the water until they finally find their preferred catch. Many of you will agree with me that actually finding someone to date goes nothing like it does in the movies, there is no lift door about to close that you're racing towards only to be stopped by the hand of a handsome man. Once you're in the lift you notice that the music seeping through his ipod earphones is in fact you FAVOURITE song (what are the chances). Luckily you are the only two in the lift and therefore are able to strike up an un-awkward conversation... "Justin Bieber.. loooove him", and just like that with an eye locking moment you find yourself two weeks down the line dating Mr. Wonderful.

NO! it does not work like this, who is going to say yes to a date with a random that you met in a lift that's listening to JBiebs anyway? Luckily for me, both of my digs mates have recently entered into the dating game. One met Mr. Bravado while doing a promotion in the holidays and after he pursued her for more than two months she finally agreed to go out on a date with him, although its only been a couple of dates she seems to have found someone whose company she enjoys as well as shares a lot in common with. The other met Mr. Villiera on campus one day.. both realizing there ambitions of being successful and on top of the world they too decided to join forces. Now not only is this a major blow to my ego as the only attention I seem to be getting from guys is my trainers hand positioned under my ass to get me to lunge lower! This then made me wonder : does it depend on the time and place you're in that makes you more susceptible to dating? It definitely has nothing to do with looks and personality as I am a 10 in both areas.

All I know is that if this is the case UCT and Sea Point are my new hangouts as Fez and High Cape are clearly not working in my favour.. neither is Wembley square gym I guess. Ooooh well there are plenty of fish in the sea and I better just be patient with my hook,line and sinker.

Check this out!!

If your looking for anything going on in Cape Town,whats hot and the vibe thats happening go to http://www.2oceansvibe.com/ Awesome blog that will something for everyone to read :)

Its a Boy Girl thing

By now our tans have faded, highlights have darkened and we're all tired of having sand in our shoes. Summer is gone and so begins a new season in Cape Town.New stories to make,new loves to have and new wardrobes to get. One thing about winter that may put a dampener on things is that the nights seem to be lonelier and my bed now has space for two...except there's only one occupant! Being in Cape Town I thought I'd have my fair share of options to choose from, after all this is home to some of the best looking guys around. What did not cross my mind however is that in actual fact that guy at the table next to me that I'm trying to make eye contact with, is actually checking out my brother and his mate.. hmmm major ego booster!

The type of men in CT can be classified into a few cliques. The places they flock to after dark provide them with the company they keep and therefore the groups to which they fit. The Jol Whores: These boys follow the newest upcoming clubs and places to be seen at and obviously can be spotted at their regular table at Caprice on a Sunday drinking red bull and vodka (Grey Goose only please). The Long Streeters: Long street is home to a massive variety of people, however those who seem to dominate are out scouting for retro or emo jols where they can rock to dub step and trance till 6 in the morning. Here the type of guy gets very interesting and your spade lines may get lost under debates of who's skinnies are skinnier or who's dreads are longer. Tigers Prisoners: These boys will rarely be seen anywhere else as they have a commitment to Tiger on a Tuesday,Thursday,Friday and Saturday. They will most likely be sporting the typical blue collared shirt with the collar popped (a must), heavily gelled hair (with frosted tips) blue jeans and square toe shoes.. and yes sometimes these are white. If I can offer some advice, Tiger should only be visited when ones numbers are low as this is known to be an easy hunting ground.

Yes this may sound like a girls free ticket to finding a bed warmer but I'll warn you that each of these places needs to be sifted through if you're looking for a keeper. Although girls travel in small packs they are not however tied down to one male clique, we prefer to change it up a little rather than risking a lame night out. Clique Bouncing (we'll call it) comes hand in hand with the perfect look.. hello first impressions are everything! Unfortunately for us females as a group, there are always those that will let us down. Recently at a friends toga party I found myself cringing for some of the girls. In my mind a toga is a bed sheet that gets wrapped around ones body in a Grecian style, some lovely ladies however thought they were meant to use their pillow cases rather than sheets. Let me just say that it looked as though someone had cling wrapped a bag of hail .

Lucky for us all - boys and girls. There is soon to be a major influx of hot (hopefully) tourists heading to our land and I wish you all the best of luck in finding your big spoon.

Seventh time lucky

The day arrives.. april the 9th 2010. attempt SEVEN! In my mind this is it.. no going back, this will be the final time I attempt my drivers as I can no longer take the rejection, its worse than a typical night out at tiger for a ginger. After a 2hour driving lesson I arrive at the yard, more nervous than i've been before.. i think! My hands are sweaty, knees week, arms are heavy feel like my breakfast might come up soon.. im like Eminem before his big rap battle. My instructor told me to wear something short and now im regretting my decision not to. When I see the tester walking towards me I try play the situation up a little so that he feels sorry for me.. bending over and breathing slowly I tell him how nervous I am and im not feeling to well, his response " do you have your learners on you!?" Awesome.. its going great already.. one can only imagine the sweat flowing from every place possible making the situation more uncomfortable that necessary, but when he doesnt ask me to do my inside checks it makes me think that maybe today wont be too bad..!?? "So I understand this is not your first attempt?" aaaah the question I hate most.. so embarrassing to answer, if it was a measly 3 times I would be bragging but to have to admit to "um.. not its my 7th" cheeks blazing is not fun.

The 20min yard part flies by and when Im over the hill start and realise that im out the yard I burst into tears.. I can see the look on his face thinking "oh God not a crier.. Please no" ( men cant handle it when girls cry..ha) "wwwhy are you crying.. just relax" through sobs "im sorry its just i 've.. never been through the yard before" these were happy tears by the way but I can see him thinking I am mad.. and how he wished he didnt have to take this delinquent driver for her test today. By now he is probably as nervous as I am and out of the corner of my I, I catch his foot floating close to the brakes and clutch.. just in case it comes to that. Okay so far so good.. im relaxing more and more and am feeling pretty smug in the drivers seat.. this does not last long however as we approach the mount Vesuvius of hills. In first at the bottom..approaching 30 revs..must change to 2nd? chug chuug chuuuuug up this hill, barely moving..need to change down to 1st..while I am fine with my use of acceleration i forget to push the clutch full in and probably burn about half of the tyre tread off. Almost suffering from an asthma attack from the rubber smoke my tester has to use his clutch and change down for me. Done, fail, good job Jess, you will now be that girl who is just not able to pass her drivers..fuck!

But have no fear its obviously my lucky day, he turns to me and says just carry on.. dont stress.. woooohooooo nothing can stop me now. This guy is putty in my hands and im going to pass. This gives me a small leap of confidence enough to get the the end of the route.. and now its hell all over again while you have to wait for them to add up your points. I always wonder how they used to calculate points in the old days as all my previous instructors have whipped out some fancy Nokia or Samsung ( this is where all the money you pay goes to) to help them with the points. The waiting is not cool, it takes forever and I cant see what he's writing or ticking/crossing making it worse.. it feels like I've been waiting for over an hour when he looks over at me and sighs.. Oh shit. Okay Jessica you must realize that you did make some mistakes that are not acceptable but I can see you are nervous and can drive (I. CAN. DRIVE. HELLO) so.... pass box: tick :). To explain my excitement and other feelings is hard to put in writing.. Obviously I cry again and hug him ( I feel like I should be doing much more -which would obviously not be appropriate) but seeing how he reacted to the hug, i opt for a hand shake instead.

Ha haa I am now officially a driver.. watch out for me on the roads Cape Town.

To lunge... or not to lunge!?

Sorry about the delay on a new post but material has been lacking :)

I'm proud to announce that I am no longer sisters with the Kalahari desert as I recently experienced a rain fall that ended my drought.. thanks to tiger ( land of the lunges). When I was thinking about lunging and how its always a hot topic of conversation.. who lunged who, will I lunge tonight etc etc. it dawned on me that so many girls as well as myself will never opt for making the first move, and when you ask the guys they're always saying how they wish girls would make the first move......

I'm pretty sure that most girls ( and boys) would agree with me when it comes to the daunting task of coming right, no one wants to psych themselves up to the point of no return and then get hit with a rejection so hard that the music stops playing and the spotlight is soley focused on you.This may in fact be a major reason for the lack of initiation from the girls side.

There are many types of rejection that one may experience (not that I know from personal experience but that I've heard of). 1. The flat hand bat: This consists of the lunger making a move, eyes closed and lips pouting only to be greeted by a flat palm from the batter to the lips of the lunger.. in a case like this one hopes that no one else is around and that there is a quick escape route.. also that it is dark so the redness of embarrassment cant be seen, if it is noticed one can always claim bar rash. 2.The Cheek: Ooooh the cheek, this could easily be the worst type of bat to receive. Similar to the flat hand the lunger is greeted with a cheek, however in most cases the cheek can be mistaken for the mouth (especially after a few drinks) and so the lunger thinks he's been accepted and therefore continues to lunge which then means tongue and spit and an even bigger loser complex when they realise that it is in fact only... the CHEEK!!! 3. The pigeon neck: This rejection always seems to be made when others are around or in close view as well as the likely hood that more than one or two of your mates were present for this bat ( much to their enjoyment). Now in this case the lunger will literally lunge, in some cases from more than 1metre away (hence the name lunge) and just go for it, not expecting it the batter in shock will draw back their neck and face in the fastest movement possible to avoid any contact with the lips.. facial expressions on an occasion like this are priceless. I am lucky enough to have a friend who is prone to experiencing bat on many occasions, and I can say that it is often the highlight of my night to see him trying.. As harsh as this may sound, if you have a friend who is down on their luck with the lunge.. stick around, i can guarantee some serious entertainment for your evening!

Beating the bulge (well trying)

Like most girls my age, weight is always an issue or a permanent voice in the back of ones head. Since std 9 i've been trying my hardest to do what I can to tone and tighten..but its harder then you think. It's almost as though once a diet starts the only adverts on tv are about chocolates or ice-cream, and all you want to do is eat..eat EAT! Since first year spread (probably the most depressing thing that comes with starting varsity), and you try and reassure yourself thats its not soo bad until you see your parents for the first time and the expression on their faces says it all. Also sublte hints such as why dont you have the salad, you love salads or lets just order water for the table.. since when did i love salads and water for a meal... never! First year spread.. check! constant need to loose the booze bulge.. check.. motivation for gym/running... still working on it. Now that im in Cape Town, I wanted to make a change & due to my major lack of motivation I invested in a personal trainer.

Every December we go to Knysna, and there are about 5/6 families that have been going for over 10 years.. each year we arrive everyone looks the same despite a hair colour change or something subtle..however this year one of our members arrived looking buff and cut like he had just entered into a Mr. Abs competition.. this aswell as and ego bigger then his pecs will ever become. The admiration that he got from eveyone made me realise that this is my goal.. I want to come back in December and have everyone commenting on me and drooling over me, all those who used to view me as just one of the groups will be elbowing eachother out the way to get a lunge in.. but i'll be batting them away with extreme enjoyment.

To top off my insecurities of appearances, I am lucky enough to live with to beauties who can basically eat whatever and whenever they want and still come out looking ontop.. its great! So, now I have signed up with a trainer.. feeling a bit nervous I go for my first meeting with him. Of course he is this massive guy with biceps bulging so much that he probably cant bend his arm enough to hold his cellphone on his ear, let alone get into the right position to wipe his bum. He's a Shwartzenegger look a like.. minus about 3m in height, but he's awesome. 'What are your goals' he asks... 'Um to wow everyone who sees me in December, if people are worrying that I might have an eating disorder wont bother me either'. you know what they say nothing tastes as good as thin feels (still questioning that). Anyway we have established the goals and aims for my training programme and tomorrow the shit hits the fan. Not only am I seriously unfit, I am a smoker which adds to the struggle in being able to work out for longer than 30 min.

I have to admit that my first three sessions were not too bad and I was feeling pretty happy with myself, and im sure I can see a difference in my thighs.. maybe its just a mirage from the dehidration i've suffered. After the first week im feeling positive about training and week two comes along-Monday: 20 min warm up& I almost fainted.. then into the PIT. This is already daunting on its own with all those roided up beefcakes benchpressing so much they're about to pop an intestine or something. As if this is not bad enough I am doing squats and lunges and 1 min runs every 30sec and im DYING physically. I have to ask for a break as i'm seeing black dots in my eyes and the colour has drained from my face completely, breaks over and its no mercy for me. I am sweating so much that it looks like i've been training in the swimming pool... definately not going to find a boyfriend in the gym, and if I do well love is blind then. An hour goes by and training is finished.. thank god! Now this is what I call a work out session, my legs are so shakey that im walking down the stairs as though I have polio, legs so wide apart im practically sitting on the steps and a full dependancy on the banister.. it must be a hilarious sight. To be honest the feeling doesnt get better it only gets worse and today I feel as though someone has beaten my thighs with a wooden spoon and a hose pipe they're burning so badly... for all this pain, the results better be worth it.