Dress to impress

Boys.Men..whatever you are. I think it's time you come to the realisation that you are no longer in 1st year (for those of you who are, you're excluded) and Stellenbosch Jool is not a year round function.. so please, put your wife beaters and T-Savs away. Get in the shower, have a scrub, cut your hair and give your self some tlc man! It is so frustrating to see a guy who thinks it's ok to go 'bergie like' because they're not at work or "it's chilled man". First impressions do count and it makes such a difference when you make an effort with what you're wearing and ESPECIALLY what you smell like.

Places like Trenery and Country Road don't exist for nothing. Someone who is also very worth looking at is Chad Hudson. His line Dirty Funka has just launched and he has awesome jerseys and cardis etc. for boys. I'll get photos up this week.

Love.ya.byiie.

Feeling very sorry for... me.

No funny stories for today. I'm lying in bed with my mouth all stitched up and in agony.. Feeling very sorry for myself ( which I'm sure you can imagine).I have now seen at least 40 women get Porcelain Veneers and cry when their new look is revealed. Hand flapping in front of face, tears flying, step RIGHT up to mirror "I never knew I was so beautiful". Come on! There is such crap on tv. I've decided to turn it off and read my book.. It's a little hard to concentrate as I am super zonked on pain killers. Who even knows what I'm writing here ;)

Peace Biyatches.

ohh what a day. are you having a laugh???

I'll set the scene for you : wake up at 7.20 am (taxi coming at 7.45 ) not hungover yet as I'm still on dad from last night. Press snooze. WHY was snooze invented, it only sets one up for trouble. Thank god the taxi was late.. Get to the airport and try to eat my hangover away. Waiting in line for security check, I see an old man trying to cut the snake of metal poles that shows us how to queue (wtf?) unfortunately for him and much to MY enjoyment he did the limbo a little too low and ended up face first on the tiles. great. Creeped some people out on bbm while I was bored and had some hangover humour.When I handed my ticket to be checked etc. I kid you not I was the only person on the whole plane who got asked for id.. I had to feel if maybe I had a turban on that I'd forgotten about!? On the plane now, and this ALWAYS happens to me. I try not make eye contact with anyone, as if it's going to better my chance of having an empty seat next to me BUT the one time I happen to look up - BOOM my eyes lock with the fattest person on board.. and I just know.. he's headed my way.. whats even better is he's in the middle!

So now I'm at the window and bursting for the loo, fatty is having a lovely dos next to me : mouth open, head hanging and the odd loud grunt. I have to some how climb OVER him from my seat, jump onto the other ladies chair and then onto the floor. I manage the first time as I'm facing the people behind me, but on the way back they where the lucky audience of my version of " that thong tha thong thong thoooong". Finally we land and I make my way onto to the Gautrain, chewing gum obviously as I don't want to greet my mom with lasts night tequila mouth. Get a tap on the shoulder and its a security guard " es-ca-UUUSe me sista. No gum allowed" hand out, waiting for me to spit it out like a 5 year old does. Even though I'm thinking is this guy for real, I still spit it out, but into my hand not his don't worry. This day, could not have gone any better.. its karma for last nights antics.

Finally I'm home and its time for a sleep.. bye.

Give it a Trance ☮

I like lame music with words that have sentimental value. My friends laugh at me because most of them are into some sort of electro/trance/ DJ's etc and I don't have a clue what they're on about half the time. To get me on the dance floor takes A LOT of persuasion and tequila. If you want a laugh try get me out there.. ha. Last time I went to an out-of-comfort music jol, was to a Dub Step thing and I still have images of myself copying the girl next to me : just raise your hand (whole hand up or just two fingers, your choice) and pump it into the air.. along with the beat of course, not sure I was able to do both.

Tonight I'm braving Labrynth at Trinity with some of Cape Towns biggest music livers.. trance and electro are their life. I've been told to wear flats and casual clothes. I picture it to be like the movies, when I walk in the DJ is going to scratch his disk and everyone's going to be like w.t.f!? haha jokes, it wont be so bad.. I've been practicing some basic moves I learnt on how to dance 101. Also, I have a wingman who's not so trancey herself. Wish me luuck. I might just find my calling tonight.

look it up.

A very cool site to visit if you're bored or just looking for random laughs is : www.thefactsite.com

"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

In movies you always see the same type of guys throwing out the most hilarious pick up lines. Although they never really work, they are pretty funny and you have to give a guy credit for trying... Here are some very funny/classic ones I've heard or read about:

Do you wash your pants in Windex? Because I can see myself in them.

Let's do breakfast tomorrow. Should I call you or nudge you?

Am I cute, or do you need another drink?

Aw, girl, I'm gonna have to put you on my "To Do" List!

I have a six inch tongue and I can breath through my ears

Do you sleep on your stomach? No. Can I?

I guarantee you that none of these will be work, but it will definitely make for an interesting night :)

Pick meeeee

I 100% support everyone and their blogs HOWEVER i'm thinking that Fashion blogs are a tad over done these days and awesomeness blogs like mine ;) are not getting recognized enough. Please like/follow/show your friends my blog....

Fail proof system. ha! ' ?....!'

A dear friend of mine, dear but disgusting told me a while ago about a system he brings into play with the 'ladies'. I remembered it today and couldn't help but chuckle to myself. We'll call him Fabio. Fabio, bless his heart is some what of a nympho and not shy to share his stories with those who are keen to lend an ear. Be careful if you catch him after too many beers as you will be re living his reality pornos. Anyways the other night after a jol we all went home and he goes straight to the computer and logs onto FB. I immediately am thinking, oh god this can't end well. He calls me over and with a huge grin on his face and points to the screen...

Through slightly blurred vision I make out his sent messages and a lot of them having been sent right now. The message.. A single question mark. I'm busy thinking old Fabs is super pissed tonight. However he dives into the explanation of his 'system'. Which is this, he sends about 10 girls a ? And if they reply with a ! He knows he is getting lucky. What intrigues me most is he sends all of them at the same time.. Which lead to me ask 'but what if more that one replies with a !' And to that he replies with a smug ' well then its my lucky night and I'm a every lucky guy.

Sis on you boys and shame on you slappers :)

quality not comfort

For one to state that they dress themselves for comfort, is.. Bullshit. I know I don't get up in the morning and think - today I will be most comfortable in long johns, my gardeners hoodie and grans socks.Its ok to wear this because its comfortable.NO!

This is not ok! I'm not trying to be your Trynny or Susanna here but seriously put in some effort and dress to impress. It's a lot better for ones self confidence to get a comment about nice boots rather than a turned up nose at your velvet tracky bums.

Straight eye for a queer guy.......?

I was on a cruise for the holidays and on our second night met a very sweet very camp guy. After one too many drinks he confessed to me ( while making eyes at the guy at the end of the bar for hours) that he had slept with that guy on the first night. I wasn't too sure why he was giving me all the details after only knowing each other for a few hours.However I thought i'd try my luck and probe with the questions and see where I got. I started off chilled with a " oh so do you like him, did you meet him here etc" ?. After a long pause and sigh he says, "well the thing is,this guy (at the end of the bar) is actually on the cruise with his girlfriend and her family and after a few drinks last night told me he had always been curious about being with another guy.. and so it happened on the top deck of the boat in the early hours of the morning.

I couldn't help but respond with a seriously shocked.. "oh my god!" Shame poor guy, his experimenter had then proceeded to act like he didn't know him and be all hanky dory with his girlfriend and his family for the rest of the trip :(.

So um ladies... watch out and don't let your boyfriends wander to far.. haha!

its a shore thing.

Jersey shore, Jordy Shore, Clifton shore.. we all claim hate them but we secretly love to watch other people being clowns and behaving like slappers. Unfortunately the cast of my all time fave. Jersey shore is being revamped.. apparently snook dog and sitch are demanding too much cash for each episode and as Jersey is fill of aspiring GTL"S they will no doubt have an abundance of newbies to choose from.

I wont lie.. I will miss the old ones, but it will be interesting to see how many snookies there are to offer.